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Struggling

So about once every 6 weeks I struggle with the idea of be a SAHM. My hormones get all crazy and I get lethargic and can barley function much less be the mom that I want to be but here I am still a mom and still at home after 2 years. 


It has been a long day with up and down battles with myself and Rex. I hate right now that on these days I'm stuck at home and can't get our of the house. It takes much more energy to load up a car and leave the house than to walk to the park that is almost right behind my house but still on days like this I want to get far away not just around the corner. 


I did have some high points today that remind me why I love what I do. We headed outside for some much needed sunshine and fresh air and played with chalk. This is Rex's first time playing with chalk and he really enjoyed it. 




Another great thing about chalk is that it can be a fun way to teach as well. For Rex it is fun but for me not so much. See I'm allergic to chalk so I have to make the decision do I want to be itchy for the rest of the day and teach Rex with chalk or do I want to just sit back and watch him play. Well I did both! First some play...then some teaching...then some more play. He really had fun and I can see us doing this much more than we have in the past. I will have some itchy days ahead of me.


I did the tradition letters and numbers but it was hard to keep playing around those because I had to keep washing my hands off everything I would touch the chalk so I created a game with shapes! I drew shapes on each square of the sidewalk and then wrote the word in there so Rex would know that each shape also has a word that goes with it. Then I asked him to find the heart (not pictured), then the square, triangle, circle, and star. Then I started mixing them up. He did pretty good considering we haven't worked on shapes much. This will probably become one of our favorite outside games although next time I will keep it closer to the door, out of the sun (the sidewalk was hot on his feet), and away from our parking lot. 


So all in all today, it was rough but I'm still glad I'm a SAHM! I really do love it just every 6 weeks I get a little nutty and wonder what it would be like 'out there in the real world' and then I remember that I am in the real world and that if I wasn't at home with Rex then some stranger would be raising him and that's not OK with me. 


Just for my own sake........I LOVE BEING A STAY AT HOME MOM!!!!!!!! Maybe that will help me get through tomorrow.




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Comments

  1. I struggle too. I have days that I wish I could be at home with Jude every day and then I have other days that I am so thankful to have the opportunity to work outside of the home. It is hard. I wish I could find the perfect part time job and do both. :O)

    ReplyDelete
  2. I can't wait to stop working in 2.5 months (when we move). I do enjoy working, but feel like I'm missing so much at home. I'm sorry you're feeling so conflicted <3

    Thanks for linking up to Toddle Along Tuesday at Growing Up Geeky and Our Growing Garden!

    ReplyDelete
  3. It is definitely a tough job. I too feel trapped sometimes. It really gets easier as they get older, I promise! They make these cool chalk holders now, so you wouldn't have to touch the chalk, or you could wrap the end with a plastic baggie. Also, if you get a water spray bottle and lightly spritz the chalk before using it, the dust won't fly. I am allergic to chalk dust too, and it has really helped! I am following your blog via GFC now, follow back if you like!

    Jessica K
    http://mom4realky.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  4. The plan is for me to stay home with our eventual baby (we're planning to start TTC in the fall-ish)and sometimes I worry that I will have freak outs, like those that you speak of. I guess this post reminds me that I probably will have a few melt-downs and that it is okay! :0

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  5. girl when my boys were younger i used to feel this same was... who am i kidding i still have good days & bad days at home with the kids especially since it's summer. Your not alone in it. Keep that in mind.
    woud it help your allergy if you put on rubber gloves or something when you used it.
    i stopped by from mrs.t. nice to meet ya.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Most of my days are good but I have those days where they are bad. I just try to make sure that I'm extra cautious that I don't let Rex know that it is a bad one and that helps.

    @Carly Anne you will have those days but we were made to do this so it's not as hard as long as we remember that God created us to do it.

    Thank you all for following along and I will return the favor.

    ReplyDelete

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