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This Pregnancy has Made Me Wimpy!

Yep I'm being wimpy but not in the way that I can't handle the pregnancy or the baby although I know I have times like that too. But in the way that I hate leaving Monkey. Last week I had to leave him twice and you would think that I would like the break since I sometimes complain about being so tired after having him all day (he has a ton of energy and I just don't). Nope! That wouldn't be the case. Instead I freak out about him leaving. I just can't stand him going somewhere or being with someone else. 

This isn't a case of 'staying at home with him' either. We have had date nights where we have my parents babysit or even someone else. I have done night classes at church and had a babysitter. I have had girl nights out and had babysitters and I welcomed them all. Heck, I planned them and arranged for him to have a babysitter and gladly took the time to enjoy myself.

Not now! I can't think of any other reason then the fact that I'm pregnant and it's making me into a big WIMP! You would think that I would enjoy a night out with the hubby and the family at a Rockies game but instead I'm thinking about the fact that Monkey is at home with a babysitter who I adore! She took him to the park, played with him at home, even had him clean up before bed! She's great and Monkey cried the next morning when he woke up and realized she wasn't there to play with him. He obviously didn't mind Mommy being gone for the night. I hated thinking about the fact that someone else was tucking him into bed and that I wasn't there for it. I even have a hard time when Hubby puts him to bed to give me a break. I just want to run in a cuddle with him.

The other time this week we were apart was for the fishing derby. Fun for MonkeyHubbyright? Well Hubby got up early with my dad to head up to Loveland, CO so all the cousins could fish and play together. Yep just more fun for Monkey and Hubby went along so that I could be sleeping in. Instead I got up and helped them get everything out the door. I went outside crawled in the car and was talking to Monkey and helping make sure he was all ready to leave. Hubby standing outside the car kept saying, "Come on Mommy, you know it's only 45 minutes away". Yes, I know that but I'm not going and your taking my baby away! 

Seriously! What is wrong with me! All week long I want to get extra sleep!

WIMP!!!! Right here!!! I actually truly believe that I know that with only 7 1/2 weeks left until my due date that I know my time with Monkey is going to be limited. I know that I'm going to have to share my time with the new baby. I know that my love is going to have to go to two boys instead of just one and I think I'm pretty nervous about how I'm going to do that. How am I suppose to show Monkey that I still love him just as much as I ever have when I now have to show love to Goose too? How do you split that up without one of them missing out on something? Seriously about ready to cry right now! 

I'm curious does anyone else feel this happening to them with there second pregnancy due date coming up? Or have any advice for me from someone that has already gone through it? I could really use some help in knowing how to deal with this. I need to do something because if Goose has any of the health issues that Monkey does I'm going to be away from him for awhile and have many extra things to do than just the normal 'new baby' things.

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