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Being Married to an Unbeliever

Being married to an unbeliever is no simple task. I can't say it is more or less difficult because every marriage is different and I can only speak to my own experience.

As I sit here tonight while my hubby is out working a night job for a week I'm reading "Winning Him Without Words" by Dineen Miller and Lynn Donovan. It has been on my wish list through Amazon for a while not and I finally thought I should just grab it from the library.

See I've been looking for support from other women that are in the same place as I am. Even though I run a Christian moms group and go to church I have no one in my life that is a Christ loving wife and mama that has an unbelieving husband. So I thought maybe I should read some books and maybe I'll get support that way.

So far the book hasn't taught me anything I don't already know. If I would have read this book earlier in our marriage maybe it would have been more helpful.With all that we have been through together and the studying I've done on being a Christ loving wife I think I have down what I'm reading in this book.

I have known from the beginning that we are supposed to be together. The church I was attending at the time really tired to convince me to not marry him until he was a believer and said the same again when we started trying to have babies. Instead of listening to them I prayed. God met me there and promised me that I was making the right choice and that Hubby would return to Christ again! It was great to hear that promise from God as a new and confused Christian wanting to marry someone who share my belief.

Of course back then I was naive and thought "Great! I'm sure it will be soon and we will have a long life of going to church and praying together just like other couples do at church." Well not that we are halfway through year 9 together and he seems to be farther away than ever I wonder what I'm doing wrong sometimes. This is why I was looking for support. I wanted to read something from someone in my shoes that knows what I'm going through.

So half way through the book here's what I have to concluded...

I'm doing things right! I'm respecting my husband. I'm letting him take lead and trusting that God is looking out for us. I'm living my life the way God is directing and I'm teaching my boys about God and His love.

Here's the catch...

I'm awful at praying! I'm awful at reading and studying the Bible. I know that I should be at least praying everyday for my hubby to be saved but I don't. If I'm completely honest it might be only a few times a month and normally when Monkey prompts me to pray for daddy. I think I feel such a peace that he will return because of God's work to me before our marriage that i don't have this burning desire to pray. I almost feel like God's got this. He doesn't need to hear this from me everyday.

According to the book that would be wrong. But I don't believe everything I read. I mean they are human and although this book would be very good for a new believer struggling with a unequally yoked marriage I think I will continue on my path. Things are good here and that's what matters. What is happening in my house.

For me I choose to pray for what's on my heart and for me that normally includes asking for God to guide my hubby to make the best decisions for our family, to keep him healthy so he can continue to work and provide for our family, to bring in the right jobs for our company, and that he will have enough energy and time each week to grow his relationship with our boys. These are the everyday needs that are on my heart and some days salvation is there too. I know that God keeps his promises and I know even through we've been married for 8 1/2 years and I can't see any new changes that God can. He can see where his heart is and He can guide me to what I need to pray for as well. So please remember that prayer is important and praying for your spouse is important whether they believe or not.

So now before you click out of this page close your eyes, bow your head and pray for your spouse. You never know what could change from one prayer!

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